Denial is a very powerful emotion, I understand it as I’ve been in denial many times in my life, the most poignant moment was when I was at my biggest weight. I was truly in such a state of denial that I only saw what I wanted to see in the mirror, I had convinced myself that I was ok and maybe I wasn’t the size I once was but it wasn’t really that bad. It took a few epiphany moments for me to get into the head space to turn it all around. When I started to despise shopping because nothing looked good to me, the moment I realised that a size 20 (NZ) pair of jeans were only just doing up. I even thought that the sizes must just be wrong, I honestly at that time still thought I was ok. When my sister had her baby shower at almost full term and we played the game to guess the circumference of her waist, this was one of the biggest moments that helped me get out of my state of denial. When I realised that my stomach was BIGGER that my full term pregnant sister I finally woke up and realised I’m the only one in control and I can change this!
Today is a milestone for me, it’s been 5 years since I started my weight loss journey, losing the weight became like my job, I was so focused that I knew I could do it and I let nothing stand in my way. It was a much tougher journey than I thought it would be, mentally and physically but the psychological aspect of weight loss is much bigger than what a lot of people realise. While initially all I wanted was weight loss I have learnt over the years that becoming healthy and nourishing my body have now become the most important driving force to me these days. I have kept my weight off for 4 years with a couple of minor fluctuations – which I’ve also learnt is just part of the journey. I’m not perfect!
My biggest piece of advice is to just start making changes, you don’t have to be perfect, perfection will get you nowhere. However it does takes time and each day you have the opportunity to make changes, some days seem easy and other days it feels incredibly overwhelming. It’s not about becoming a certain “weight” or “size”, it’s about being comfortable with your body and whatever that means to you. The results are so worth it, treat your body with the respect it deserves, it’s the only one you have!